I have seen so little in my time, because I'm always running out. I'm born late.
Track Name: Living up to Nothing
Old. Impaired. Where my head hits the ground. The cold stare, the eyes that drag me down. Living up to nothing. It's been ten years since I've been proud of anything I've done. Living up to nothing. It's my own fault.
Track Name: Change
Forced fed personalities that I wear so willingly. I have not been my self as of late. A mirror stares, portraying changing faces. I am a reflection that speaks my name. Hangovers show my true face. Disgusting. I live in this town that changes names, with the breaking of bottles to help maintain. I live in this town that forces change. One day I might find myself, but as of now I don't know how. So, with this bottle to my lips and words on my tongue, I expel the last of the things I have become. A change is needed but my eyes still stay thirsty. Fogged minds and blood shot eyes need clear skies to help the rain subside.
Track Name: Ambitions
Smothered, by people half as important as those I've always ignored. Rabbi's in church on Sunday. Failures mistaken for courage. I made the world a promise, just so I could take it back. Find faith in everything everyone has been. Motivation does not exist. I'm destined for hating myself again. Even god sins. Cumming the last of my ambitions in my hand, maybe now I can hold on to them.
Track Name: Self Comfort
I have found compatibility within myself, so there is no need to stop bleeding. Because it is my own. I am prone to self mutilation, so there is no need to stop bleeding. Blessed with nothing because I find flaws in everyone. I want to forget but hold onto the mistakes so i can remember (to be alone). Walk the streets with the company of nothing surrounding. My mind talks to me and I'm comfortable.
Track Name: As I Wake
Seep through my fingers. As I shake. Piece lies together. As I wake.
Track Name: Repeating
I am scaring myself again. Falling into a new spiraled addiction. I am breaking bones again. Falling down, staying down, what the point to getting up? Plummeting down the same over worn hills we have tried to climb countless times. The bottom again. Alone, lost, bruised. Is this healing skin? Or am I repeating youth's memories. I don't want to be I again.
Track Name: Wasted Love
Wasted love spirals the drain. I'm so ashamed of my cum. Images my seed can't puncture. (sex) In my head I can't escape. Addicted to screens of disgusting realities. Addicted to fetish which grow deeper. Wasted love fills my head. I am so ashamed. slanted back with mind around the ankles. Feelings gripped tight as I start to strangle, the images of lust: The images of wants. Head dropped in shame, by the act I just did. Until I am sprung again. Wasted love fills my head. Wasted love spirals the drain.
Track Name: Dreams
Dreams are my days. The ones I want to keep. I am out of touch with reality. I want to escape the pressures of the day. The eight hours of running into dead ends. So, in these sheets, with any excuse to sleep.
Track Name: Passenger
Mornings spent as a passenger to the rising sun. (In due time we will go blind and wake to a new day. But, until then we will wait for the light to fade.) I'll be a passenger of emotions, taking new exits home. I'll be a passenger of feelings, in a room all alone. I'm a passenger in my own skin. I want control.